I was an angry child, i had fought, bitten screamed and broken things in the past, so being called to the principal usually meant i had done something, and was in trouble.
I got up to walk to door, my mind already prepared to walk into that office, smell my mother's perfume (Chypre by Coty)and menthol, see her face with her lips pulled to thin stripes, signaling her rage.
She would ask,
"What did it do this time" she always referred to me as it*.

(This does not really translate well)

It was something that happend before.
I was prepared for this outcome.
So that was what I had in the back of my mind.
As i stepped to the class door, the asiatant principal (adjunct-directeur) told me i was to pack my bag and take it with me.
I was not prepared for that, i was not prepared for everything that followed.

I protested, told again it wasn't me, i had not done it.
The Teacher looked at me as the vice (thats the word) principal said "Noortje just, please ok?" There was a strange look

In her eyes, and a weird sound in her voice... as the angry girl i was, i groaned, grabbed my bag angrily and stormed out of the class room, and stomped to the principals office.
Knocked on the door, and was told to come in.

There was no perfume, no Mother, just a chair i had expected her to be in, now occupied by one of the ladies from the schoolteam.

She wanted to know how i was doing, complimented the fishtail braid, and asked who had put it in.

When i told her whom had, her face turned

Grim, when she asked if that was my sister.
Somewhat happy i was seemingly not in trouble, i happily confirmed.

I knew the school team lady, she, my mother, and father, had spoken about me going to Special school before.

She swallowed, and told me, something had happend at home, and My grandmom was picking me up.

Hearing that, the tip of my braid went back into my mouth.

The last time "something" had happend at home, my father had been in a car collision.

Someone had hit his car hard, and he was in the hospital. I was 5 when that happened.

The school team lady walked me to the parking lot, where my grandmothers car was parked, i saw her sitting behind the wheel, full palming a cigarillo, the smoke of which escaped throug the small strip of the car window.
She was staring out the front window, her hand that was full palming the cigarillo trembled.

As the lady knocked on the glass of the driver seat window, grandma "jump scared"

And i could see she had been crying, but...Grandma did not cry...

I was walked to the passenger side door, as the lady opened it i noticed my grandmother recompose her self, and greeted me like she always did, yet it was diffrent...
"Hey, lil dragon (Draakje) you're gonna stay with me and your grandad for a bit, okay?"

I wanted to know why, but got no answer.
The lady asked my grandmother if she was going to be ok.

This was my grandmother, i never saw her phased, why would she have to be ok?

When she told the lady she was fine, the lady told her, to call if she needed help. After saying she would, we drove of.

On the way home, she asked me if i was excited for the fieldtrip, and what i wanted to do with summer vacation.
I responded, excited to go see the Penguins and the owls at the zoo...

This seemed to calm her down some, although that might have been my tangent about various animals as well.

When arriving at her house, she asked me if i wanted a coco milk with some vanilla

Ice cream.

I could sense the tension in her, but i told her yes, id like that.

As she started preparing it, she suddenly said, Doortje, liked the three flavor scoop with hers.

I could hear, she was crying.

{Trigger warning}

Ok this will be the hardest to type out.

It wont be a long one, i hope, i will describe some gruesome things, not in great detail, im not her for "gore porn"

So this your trigger warning....

Walking into the kitchen, he found my parents, my mother still holding the knife, and my father holding a bloody hammer, and Doortje dead.

The neighbour fled, called the cops.

My parents were arrested. And both got life imprisonment.

(A lot of legalese was involved)

Well thats it...thats the story, tied to the picture in my post of june 8th...

And its the reason my grandparents raised me.

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This is all ramping up, real quick.

#TrumpDictatorship #fascism